Kathryn Kong

faith, trauma, & grace

  • Show Me the Fire in Your Heart & I Will Show You Mine

    People are reasoned, while God is mad. They love only beauty; who knows what God loves? – Annie Dillard Who knew hayfever and heat could be so incapacitating? I have been languishing, lazy and lethargic in this heat; my very bones seem to have taken on weight and any attempt at movement or even mental…

    kathrynkong

    01 October 17
    kathrynkong, nonfiction
    death, homecoming, Man of Sorrows, scars, story-telling
  • Who.

    Even now I wonder: if I meet God, will he take and hold my bare hand in his and focus his eye on my palm, and kindle that spot and let me burn? But no. It is I who misunderstood everything and let everybody down. God, I am sorry I ran from you. I am…

    kathrynkong

    23 September 17
    kathrynkong, nonfiction
    darkness, faith, identity, silence
  • Some Questions

    How much does joy weigh? Does it weigh as heavy as despair, only different, without pain? Does joy have negative weight, letting the carrier walk a little lighter? Does joy look like the thing in front of you– a home-cooked meal, quiet secrets with your beloved, a blooming jacaranda? Or is it the transformation of…

    kathrynkong

    12 June 17
    kathrynkong, poetry
    despair, joy
  • Suffering in the Presence of God

    Isaiah 26:16-17: Lord, in distress we searched for you. We prayed beneath the burden of your discipline. Just as a pregnant woman writhes and cries out in pain as she gives birth, so were we in your presence, Lord. Though harsh, these words offer comfort and clarity in a place of sorrow. I hear often…

    kathrynkong

    10 June 17
    kathrynkong, nonfiction
    darknightofthesoul, faith, grace, hope, pain, presence, suffering, wilderness
  • The Darkness of God

    We travelers, walking to the sun, can’t see Ahead, but looking back the very light That blinded us shows us the way we came, Along which blessings now appear, risen As if from sightlessness to sight, and we, By blessing brightly lit, keep going toward That blessed light that yet to us is dark. –…

    kathrynkong

    29 May 17
    kathrynkong, nonfiction
    dark night of the soul, darkness, faith, grace, grief, healing, hope, light, seeing, silence, solitude, uncertainty, wilderness
  • Six Impossible Things

    The White Queen: I’m just one hundred and one, five months and a day. Alice: I can’t believe that! The White Queen: Can’t you? Try again: draw a long breath, and shut your eyes. Alice: There’s no use trying. One can’t believe impossible things. The White Queen: I daresay you haven’t had much practice. When I was your age, I always…

    kathrynkong

    18 May 17
    kathrynkong, nonfiction
    despair, faith, hope, identity, impossibility, joy
  • Learning to Lean

    The breaking began a year ago. God had spoken hard things; his words scalded me. He transitioned people out of my life, one after the next—friends, community, leaders, mentors—testing my true allegiance. He called me out of the harbor and into uncharted waters, placing me into circumstances with higher stakes than ever before. I grieved.…

    kathrynkong

    06 March 17
    kathrynkong, nonfiction
    broken, broken heart, grace, healing, wilderness
  • The Grace of Uncertainty

    Well, it’s been a long few weeks. I’ve remained silent on current affairs, not out of indifference, but because of all I do not understand. I feel the shaking, I feel a dismantling within myself, a deconstruction of who I thought myself to be and all I thought was safe and secure. It started two…

    kathrynkong

    18 January 17
    kathrynkong, nonfiction
    cancer, faith, grace, trust, uncertainty
  • On Turning 27

    Not, I’ll not, carrion comfort, Despair, not feast on thee; Not untwist — slack they may be — these last strands of man In me ór, most weary, cry I can no more. I can; Can something, hope, wish day come, not choose not to be. – Gerard Manley Hopkins A week or so ago…

    kathrynkong

    25 October 16
    kathrynkong, nonfiction
    birthday, death, despair, hope
  • A New Covenant for a New Day

    Come, come, whoever you are, Wanderer, worshipper, lover of leaving, It doesn’t matter. Ours is not a caravan of despair. Come, even if you have broken your vow a hundred times, Come, come again, come. Rumi So I have broken my vow a hundred, a thousand times, but still the Lord says, “Come.” He has…

    kathrynkong

    17 August 16
    kathrynkong, nonfiction
    all things new, covenant, grace, hope, reconciliation, restoration, the pursuit of God
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